Cuddling on the
Wild Side

I got back from IML last night and had an amazing time, which I’ll go more into detail with later. I did want to let everyone know the results.

Coming in as the 2nd runner-up is my good friend Jack Duke, Mr Texas Leather. He spent a lot of time preparing and I’m very proud of how well he did. The 1st runner-up is Lance Holman, Mr San Francisco Leather. I have no clue who he is.

The winner though is Tyler McCormick, Mr. Rio Grande Leather. He is a transgender man in a wheelchair. The first question people have when they hear that second sentence is, “Did he win because of those things?” I didn’t attend any of the contest, so I wanted to check with those that did. Everyone I talked to gave me a resounding “YES!”

Yes, he may be trans and in a wheelchair, but he’s still a fellow leatherman, and that’s all that should matter. Give support to our new International Mr Leather.

I would like to congratulate all my other friends that competed. Y’all did an amazing job and even just getting to IML is quite the accomplishment!

And if you still have any questions, check out this video of him below, especially his speech.

With some of the things kinky fuckers do, it may seem like there is a fine line between psycho and just plain kinky, but there’s really not. This guy is definitely not a kinky fucker…

BEIJING, April 21 (AFP) – A gay singer in China has been arrested for murder after he allegedly killed six men in elaborate, sado-masochistic sex games that involved hanging his victims, a state-linked newspaper reported.

Zhou Youping, a singer in bars in the central province of Hunan, posted personal ads on gay websites seeking people willing to travel to his home to play his “slave,” the Sanxiang City Express said.

He sought partners willing to play erotic asphyxiation games — the intentional restriction of oxygen to the brain for sexual arousal — and met them in hotels in the provincial capital Changsha.

“At first I wanted them to be my ‘slave’. But when they met me they wanted money or had special requests,” Zhou was quoted as saying in the newspaper, which belongs to the state-run Hunan Daily Newspaper Group, on Tuesday.

“I didn’t like that and wanted to use the hanging asphyxiation method to kill them.”

He killed his first victim in October last year after discovering the man, from the northwestern province of Gansu, was HIV-positive. He hung him as part of a sex game then left him to die.

Zhou, who is in his thirties, then killed another five men. At least two other intended victims managed to escape alive, the report added.

One of the victims who had answered Zhou’s ad, who came from the central province of Henan, lied to his wife by telling her he had found a job in Changsha.

He contacted her after arriving in the city but she received no further information until authorities called her to say they had found his body in a hotel room.

[Source]

As many of you know, I’ve been looking at getting a tattoo. Well, as fate would have it, I ran across this article on Facebook from one of my friends.

Being openly gay is like getting a tattoo. Once the deed is done and you put it out there for the world to see, there’s no turning back; except for laser removal and reparative therapy (and while the former may work, the latter is pretty much discredited, unless you’re Ted Haggard).

Although hard statistics are elusive, an anecdotal survey recently taken at a mixed straight/gay summertime cookout revealed that a disproportionate amount of gay men seem to be owners of inked bodywork. On the other hand, maybe the fact that we’ll use any feeble excuse to take our shirts off in public just makes it seem as if we have more tats than the general population.

[Full Article]

Check out the full article, but it seems to be very true that there are more gay men that have tattoos, especially large ones, than straight men.

I do disagree with the reason they give, being that we are vane and just like to take our shirts off. I would say it more likely has to do with the fact that we’re already “different” and not afraid of how people will perceive us if we get a tattoo. I think there is also the idea that a tattoo could increase someone’s perceived masculinity, and many gay men already feel they need to be hyper-masculine to the extreme.

It’s a great article and gave me some things to think about. If you have any other good tattoo articles (even if they aren’t gay), email me.

Executive Committee of International Mr. Leather has decided that it will no longer allow participation in the IML Leather Market by any entity which promotes barebacking or distributes/sells any merchandise tending to promote or advocate barebacking. [Source: Vendor Memo via Will Clark World]

Read the full article.

Picture yourself at IML 2010. You’re walking through the Leather Market, and you’ll notice that there are a couple of booths not there. Looking through the IML pamphlets and cards, you won’t see anything advocating barebacking. Stop in a hotel room, and the barebacking will likely be at the same level it has been in past years.

First of all, what’s wrong with barebacking? It greatly increases your chance of getting any number of STD including HIV. You could always of course trust the guy you met 5 minutes ago in the lobby when he tells you he’s negative. I don’t take that risk though. Then there is always the chance of getting pregnant… wait, wrong audience, but pulling out still doesn’t work in this case. Between men that are aware of all the risks involved, I don’t really have a problem with barebacking. My generation hasn’t been affected by the HIV/AIDS epidemic in the same way older generations have. For a lot of us, it’s just like walking across a busy intersection – you are pretty sure you’ll make it across safe.

The effects of this decision on the Leather Community are likely going to be relatively small. The same number of people are going to participate in barebacking. Porn studios may, but probably won’t, change their videos to reduce the number of barebacking porn they produce.

What are the effects going to be? Is it going to be good, or make barebacking something people feel ashamed of and have to hide?

I look back on all the guys that I’ve played with, dated, been friends with or just known, and there really seems to be a common trend about many of them — a lot of them are HIV+. Now I guess I don’t know if some of them really are, but some signs point to the fact that they are. I’m not a person to ask someone their HIV status, whether a friend or a fuck. For fucks, I just assume everyone is positive. People may fully believe they are negative, and even got tested today, but that doesn’t mean they are. The common HIV tests have a buffer of about 3 months that the test doesn’t include. For friends, it’s not any of my business. They can tell me if they want an feel comfortable, but I’m not going to ask and  it’s not going to change anything.

For dating it has caused some issues, especially at first. As I gain more understanding about HIV and more comfortable with it, things have been going better. I can’t think of any person that’s told me they were positive in person that I shunned away because of that. Now, if they were ugly… that’s a different story.

My other thought is that there are a lot more HIV+ people out there than I realize. Or maybe there are just more in the types of circles I hang out in.

I’m glad that HIV isn’t quite the death sentence it used to be, but it definitely does affect your life in large ways. My generation is seeing HIV in a very different way than the first generations saw it. For a lot of us, it’s an old-gay thing or some think they’ve all died out. Then you have the naive ones that ask and believe the person. Maybe I’m just a cynic, but I won’t believe someone about something that could very much change my life. My generation is being impacted by HIV and reacting to it differently because of everything that’s happened since the first boom. For the older generations, don’t get mad at us because we’re reacting differently, just try to help us understand.

One last factoid from a friend of mine -

More than 1.1 million people in the U.S. are infected with HIV and 232,700 don’t know it.

I was checking out Shotgun Video to see what he’s working on and ran across the Educational section. I never thought that my sadist interests might lead people to think I’m a candidate to become a Serial Killer, but luckily there are some differences.

[P.E. Dietz is a forensic psychologist who consistently tries to point out the absurdity of the link between s/m devotees and psychotic criminals.]

According to Dietz, the five main differences between psychotic sadistic serial murderers and SM devotees:

1. Psychotics search for unwilling partners. S/M devotees use a “safeword” that the submissive can say at any time to end the scene, thus the submissive retains real control throughout the encounter.

2. Psychotics force their acts on the victim rather than aiming at pleasing the submissive (as in s/m). The psychotic sadistic acts are quite different from s/m practices, and usually include: forced anal penetration, forced fellatio, or violent vagina-penetration with various foreign objects -rather than the penis.

3. The sadistic offenders’ demeanor is diametrically opposed to s/m devotees: usually the psychotic is detached and unemotional throughout the torture, while the s/m dominant appears to achieve a “high” or pleasure equivalent during the scene.

4. Psychotic criminals torture their victims, inflicting serious and permanent injury, trying to arouse terror in their victims. S/M devotees skillfully enhance the sexual arousal of their partner, following the rules and guidelines that were established before the scene, thus creating only the illusion that the submissive is not in control.

5. Psychotics usually have a past history of sexual crimes such as rape or incest. S/M devotees are average people who typically don’t have criminal pasts.

Park Elliot Dietz, forensic psychologist (Ph.D) [source]

Roger at Shotgun Video has some very HOT vids, especially if you love CBT (cock and ball torture). He even has a couple spots on his website where he’ll talk about how to do certain techniques and a lot of the safety aspects of kink-play. Definitely worth checking out.

I got an email from the Mr S Leather email list and wanted to share a chunk of it with everyone.

April 16, 2008 – After 8 spectacular years in Los Angeles, Mr. S Leather will be closing its store location in LA. This decision was not made lightly, but reflects today’s economic realities.

Our flagship store in San Francisco which we expanded in 2005, will continue to be our company headquarters to carry on the 30 year tradition of Mr. S Leather.

The last day of store operations in Los Angeles will be Sunday, April 26, 2009. During this time, we will be selling all inventory in this store at 25% OFF. This sale is just for the LA store and is limited to just the inventory at hand. No orders for items to be made or ordered will be taken during that time at the 25% off discount. This is a great time to stop by and pick out the piece of gear you have been thinking about getting. The Mr. S store in LA is located next to the FaultLine bar at 4232 Melrose Ave. (323-663-7765). There is parking in the back of the store, and the hours of operation are Wed thru Saturday 2PM to 10PM and Sunday 2PM to 8PM. [Full Email]

Stop by if you have a chance and it looks like they’ll have some good deals on the stuff. Feel free to send something to me if you want.

Don’t worry though, the San Fransisco Mr S Leather and the online store are still going to be around, and no, you don’t get a discount online or at the SF store.

The article below reminds me of why you should be careful with any drugs random strangers give you. Also, want to give a warning out to avoid taking poppers and viagra during the same period of time. It can cause you to die from a drop in blood pressure because they are both designed to expand your blood vessels.

Guys, if you’re having trouble with dysfunction, please don’t be an idiot and buy bootleg erectile dysfunction drugs online. Why?

Because in the last five months, THREE men from Singapore have slipped into a coma after taking knockoff drugs to help them in the bedroom and FOUR others have died.

So what are some of the medications you SHOULD NOT take?

• Zhong Hua Niu Bian
• Power One Walnut
• Santi Bovine Penis Erecting Capsule

[From UK Medix Health News via Shadow of My Life]

I’ve warned about being careful who you play with. The news story below just goes to show that you really need to be careful who you bring home, and also what expectations there are. If things get too out of control, you can always call the police. Better to have to deal with them than jail for a couple years.

Here is yet another example of why it’s a bad idea to have group sex with complete weirdos.

In July of 2007, 49-year-old Steven Bartley of Mooloolaba, Australia, and his unidentified boyfriend went to a local bar got hammered and met 34-year-old Christopher Jones and his unidentified male friend

Anyway, somehow the group decided to go back to Steven’s apartment to have a gang bang with Steven’s boyfriend. But once they got back to his place, Steven smoked some weed and passed out while his boyfriend messed around with Christopher.

That was all good and fine. But when Christopher’s friend tried to join in on the fun, Steven’s boyfriend got annoyed. So he woke Steven up and told the guys to leave.

According to court documents, Christopher told Steven, “I’m not leaving until my friend has sex with your boyfriend.” So Steven shoved Christopher out the door and over the balcony railing.

Christopher fell 12 feet before landing on the concrete and suffering a fractured skull. He was rushed to the hospital and Steven was arrested.

Yesterday, Steven pleaded guilty to committing one count of grievous bodily harm and was sentenced to two-and-a-half years in prison. [Source]