Cuddling on the
Wild Side

I found another pic of me on Guys with iPhones.

So, it’s not often I actually see pics of me around the internet, but it looks like someone took some pics I posted on Twitter and submitted them to Guys with iPhones.

Here are the photos below, click on them to view/leave some comments.

I like my sex energetic, rough and sadistic… alright… I said it.

I’m sure most of you knew that, or at least you do now. Well, last night I went and hooked up with a guy that visits Austin a couple times a year. This is the second time we met up, and I should have taken clues from the first time.

He said he wanted to be my bitch, wanted me to choke him, leave bruises on him, make him lick my boots. As we get closer to actually playing his attitude becomes a lot more vanilla, and once we start actually playing, he might as well be a plow up sex doll. He likes being choked, and he likes be fucked. That seems to be about it because when I try to do anything more he starts crying like a girl – not in the hot “I’m going to make you my bitch whether you want it or not” way either.

He likes to spend maybe 20-30 minutes fooling around and having sex, then he’s done. I have an hour minimum for having sex. After 30 min, you’re just getting to the good foreplay. I’m in for the long haul when I have sex, not some quickie that would be better served by Mr Right Hand or my FleshJack.

I’m pretty sure the guy is just a slut though. As soon as I shot my load down his throat and all over his face, he ran to the bathroom to wipe it up and take a shower. Leaving me just sitting there. He was in there for about 5 min, so I got my things together and got dressed. When I was cleaning up I noticed another condom in the trash… ugh. His hole wasn’t that tight either. He probably didn’t want me to bruise him or anything because he had to make the other guys he was going to play with later feel like they were the only ones.

Would I play with him again… probably not. Unless he truly lets me go all the way, I’ll be too bored.

When I message guys on hookup sites one of the first questions I ask is “Do you like to get kinky?” Recently I’ve been getting guys that respond with “I don’t do unsafe” or “I’m partying and only get kinky when I’m partying.”

Now what is it about being kinky that causes people to think that I want to be unsafe or PNP (Party And Play – use drugs on have sex). In my profiles, it says “Safe Only” and “No PNP”. I realize some guys don’t read that, but it feels more like they are associating kinky sex with PNP or unsafe sex.

It really does seem like there is a general understanding even within the BDSM/kink community that unsafe sex is common and almost expected. I don’t have a big problem with two informed and consenting adults making a decision to have unsafe sex, but when it’s thought to be expected and common place; I find that unacceptable.

Please play smart whether you play safe or not, and realize that the best way to play kinky is to play smart and safe.

Also, check out this amazing pamphlet – Safer BDSM Booklet July 2009 by the AIDS Committee of Toronto.

longest ive pounded is 17 minutes straight pounding different positions

[Source: Craigs List ad response]

Now, is that really something to brag about?

I’ll give you the whole ad here, but why is a top responding to another tops ad? And who really measures their ass.

25 yo masc top hisp/blk 8″ ddf i’d do it all all chores……but liv n salado……big guy like u……hav 2 live outside austn 4 me to get 2 u…….stats..44 chest 36 waist 46 ass….really wnt to fuk u if ur ddf and hiv neg…..nsa…if u hav nice feet like to lick them n suck ur toes….id suck those nps 2 but wuld luv 2 see that hot big ass n pound it……longest ive pounded is 17 minutes straight pounding different positions

Your version of sex is just not sex. Did something bad happen to you growing up to make you want to inflict pain on another and call it sex?

I got that message from a guy on adam4adam.com. Now really… what the fuck? Check out my profile and take a look.

Yeah, I’m a kinky fucker, but I have a feeling you probably already know that. What would make “my version” of sex, not sex? For me, “sex” is using sexual energies to make a connection with someone. Does it mean that either of us has to blow a load, or someone get’s fucked? Not at all. It’s been a long time since I’ve fucked someone, and a LOT longer since I’ve gotten fucked. Fucking just isn’t a part of what I regularly do for sex. Kinky/BDSM sex often generates a much stronger connection between the people because of the amount of trust it takes between the people. The only thing I’m hoping when kissing another guy is they don’t have mouth herpes or bad breathe.

Has my upbringing affected who I am as a sexual person today? I’m sure it did somehow, but I have no clue how. Yes, my parents were both very dominant, and if I didn’t become as equally as dominant and independent, I would be a push-over. Being gay and having an older brother who got all the attention until he left for college also helped me become very independent.

I was never physically punished as a child. Then again, I was always kind of an outsider through high school, and I did have a couple of bullies. I never got into any physical fights with them though. Actually, I’ve never been in a physical fight with anyone, other than maybe my brother, but that was usually us chasing each other.

To be honest, my whole upbringing was pretty uneventful. I was in the Boy Scouts,  got my Eagle Scout award, and worked at a Boy Scout camp for 6 years. I’ve always naturally fallen into a leadership role, so that may explain why I tend towards being Dominant. It still doesn’t explain my innate interest in kink though, and I’m fine with that.

I can definitely tell you how I found out I was interested in kinky shit in one word. Porn. Yes, it was the wonderful world of downloaded kinky porn that showed my that watching a muscle guy get his ball beat got me rock hard. Seeing a nice fist go up his muscle ass and listening to him moan… yup, hard again.

To the person who sent me that message – if you’re passionate and romantic sex can be sex, why can’t my animalistic and yet intellectual sessions be sex?

Oh, and did I mention, he said he’s conservative in his profile.

I’m trying to build up my blog list, especially if there are any kink-related blogs. Post me a comment with a link to your blog and any blogs you think I should check out.

Thanks!
The Cuddler

I was reading a post on one of my Twitter friend’s blog, and it spurred this post. It’s not a secret, I’m on quite a few websites out there. I’m not going to tell you which ones, but I’m sure you could find me pretty easily if you really wanted too.

Gooster mentions Bear411, in his blog and he has had a fairly different experience there than I have for the most part. I would say that 90-95% of the messages that I receive fall into the “You’re hot” category. Those messages will evoke a couple different responses from me:

The best way to get me to respond is to ask me a question that requires more than a one word answer. Fuck, just ask me a question at all and that’ll improve your chances. I will almost always respond even if I’m not interested. If you’re local, I may even meet up with you if I’m not attracted to you. Just be weary that I will be honest if you ask me if you’re my type. I try not to lie about it, you’re the one that asked. If you have any suggestions on sending effective messages, please let me know.

The other part of Gooster’s post was friends vs hook-ups. It’s very rare I’m looking for just a hook-up. I would greatly prefer to be friends over strictly fuck buds with most guys I meet. When I go to meet any person, I meet them with the plan to become friends. If fucking happens, that’s usually just a bonus, and rarely does it happen again. Not very sure why.

The bottom line is… If you’re attractive (in my eyes) and you message me, there is a very good chance I’ll respond and you better too. If not, I hope you’re fine with just being friends.